You don’t lose …

You don’t lose friends, because real friends can never be lost. You lose people masquerading as friends, and you’re better for it. ~ Mandy Hale

Lately, Facebook has been full of people saying that they are changing their lives and they don’t care if they lose friends in the process.  Is it true?

I am here to tell you that in the past two years, I have lost a lot of friends.  People that I was sure were lifers for me, disappeared.  I wasn’t prepared.

I am a social person.  As much as I love time alone with a book, or a movie, or just time to sit with “me”, I really love to have people around.

I used to have friends over for dinner, play games, everyone would go out together and have laughs and great times and I was sure that those times made us solid.  Then the break up happened.  Not just my (now) Ex and I.  But apparently my friends as well.

People stopped calling.  I realize that for a while I was a downer.  I was sad.  I went through a hard break up, financial losses, the deaths of a few family members and friends, transitions in jobs… I could go on.  I was rough, and I was alone.  Or at least I felt that way.

I am now on the road to remembering who I am, what makes me smile, and really trying to work in being a better version of who I am.  And I realize that there is no one around.

Don’t get me wrong.  I have a few really solid friends, mostly in other cities, a couple in town.  But the truth is, everyone else just seems to have forgotten.

I see them on Facebook, out “the gang” and I have never seen an invite, I make plans and they bail out all the time, we say “we need to meet up for Coffee/ dinner/ drinks” and it just never seems to happen.

Why am I posting this?  Because you need to know.  You need to know that taking that time to have coffee with a friend, inviting them out when you hang out with the group, realizing that it doesn’t bother them to be the only single one in a group of couples, makes a world of difference. Stop texting and saying how much you miss them and do something about it.

People have been asking me to start a blog.  I’m sure that this isn’t what they had in mind for my posts.  I’m sure that what was expected was a happier, hilarious Natalie, and she will re-appear.  But this, this was weighing heavy on me and I needed to get it out.

Remember, to you, it might be a cup of coffee.  To the other person, it might be the reminder that someone still wants them around.  And it means the world.